Cleavage

By STEWART WHITTINGHAM and TIM SPANTON

IT'S Cleavage Week in The Sun – and we're celebrating all things titillating! This week our red bus - topless, of course - is touring the nation in search of the next Page 3 legend. For fellas the world over, a classy cleavage really is man's breast friend - although to women it can seem more like a booby prize. For the harsh truth is a bosom can appear older or younger than its owner. Yes, girls, there's your real age ... then there's your CLEAV-AGE.

The Sun's cleavologists have come up with a fun formula to help you discover how you rate. But our complicated figures only work well for the more, ahem, mature figure - if you're a 21-year-old sex-mad fitness fan you shouldn't be worrying about your cleav-age anyway! Click picture to enlarge This is how it works: Start with your age and then add or subtract as follows: CHILDREN: +2 for each child.

WEIGHT: +2 for each pound you are overweight.

DIET: Add half a point for each takeaway meal you eat in an average week.

SEX: -2 for each time you make love in an average week.

EXERCISE: -2 for each time in a week you visit the gym or jog for 30 minutes+.

X FACTOR: -6 if you regularly wear sexy bras, -3 when you wear a standard white bra, nothing for wearing a passion killer that covers everything.

We tried our formula on 30-year-old TV host Denise Van Outen. In the C, W and D sections, she scores 0 (for having no kids), then 6 (at 8st 13lb she is 3lb over her ideal weight) and 2 (because she's fond of fast food). That gives her a total tally of 8.

In the S, E & X section, she scores -6 (for being in love with boyfriend Richard Traviss), -6 (for working out regularly) and another -6 (because she loves wearing sexy clothes). The total here is -18. That makes her cleav-age 20 (30 + 8 - 18).